ABOUT
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Information We May Collect
We collect personal information from you so that we can provide you with a positive experience when utilizing our Website or content. We will only collect the minimum amount of information necessary for us to fulfill our obligation to you. We may collect:
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Other Information We May Collect:
Anonymous Data Collection and Use
To maintain Website quality, we may use your IP address to help diagnose problems with our server, to administer the Website by identifying which areas of the Website are most heavily used, and to display content according to your preferences. Your IP address is the number assigned to computers connected to the Internet. This is essentially “traffic data” which cannot personally identify you but is helpful to us for marketing purposes and for improving our services. Traffic data collection does not follow a user’s activities on any other websites in any way. Anonymous traffic data may also be shared with business partners and advertisers on an aggregate basis.
Use of “Cookies”
We may use the standard “cookies” feature of major web browsers. We do not set any personally identifiable information in cookies, nor do we employ any data-capture mechanisms on our Website other than cookies. You may choose to disable cookies through your own web browser’s settings. However, disabling this function may diminish your experience on our Website and some features may not work as intended.
What We Do With Information We Collect
Contact You
We may contact you with information that you provide to us based on these lawful grounds for processing:
Process Payments
We will use the Personal Data you give to us in order to process your payment for the purchase of goods or services under a contract. We only use third party payment processors that take the utmost care in securing data and comply with the GDPR.
Targeted Social Media Advertisements
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Share with Third Parties
We may share your information with trusted third parties such as our newsletter provider in order to contact you via email, our merchant accounts to process payments, and Google / social media accounts in order to run advertisements and our affiliates.
Viewing by Others
Note that whenever you voluntarily make your Personal Data available for viewing by others online through this Website or its content, it may be seen, collected and used by others, and therefore, we cannot be responsible for any unauthorized or improper use of the information that you voluntarily share (i.e., sharing a comment on a blog post, posting in a Facebook group that we manage, sharing details on a group coaching call, etc.).
Submission, Storage, Sharing and Transferring of Personal Data
Personal Data that you provide to us is stored internally or through a data management system. Your Personal Data will only be accessed by those who help to obtain, manage, or store that information, or who have a legitimate need to know such Personal Data (i.e., our hosting provider, newsletter provider, payment processors, or team members).
It is important to note that we may transfer data internationally. For users in the European Union, please be aware that we transfer Personal Data outside of the European Union. By using our Website and providing us with your Personal Data, you consent to these transfers in accordance with this Privacy Policy.
Data Retention
We retain your Personal Data for the minimum amount of time necessary to provide you with the information and / or services that you requested from us. We may include certain Personal Data for longer periods of time if necessary for legal, contractual, and accounting obligations.
Confidentiality
We aim to keep the Personal Data that you share with us confidential. Please note that we may disclose such information if required to do so by law or in the good-faith belief that: (1) such action is necessary to protect and defend our rights or property or those of our users or licensees, (2) to act as immediately necessary in order to protect the personal safety or rights of our users or the public, or (3) to investigate or respond to any real or perceived violation of this Privacy Policy or of our Disclaimer, Terms and Conditions, or any other terms of use or agreement with us.
Passwords
To use certain features of the Website or its content, you may need a username and password. You are responsible for maintaining the confidentiality of the username and password, and you are responsible for all activities, whether by you or by others, that occur under your username or password and within your account. We cannot and will not be liable for any loss or damage arising from your failure to protect your username, password, or account information. If you share your username or password with others, they may be able to obtain access to your Personal Data at your own risk.
You agree to notify us immediately of any unauthorized or improper use of your username or password or any other breach of security. To help protect against unauthorized or improper use, make sure that you log out at the end of each session requiring your username and password.
We will use our best efforts to keep your username and password(s) private and will not otherwise share your password(s) without your consent, except as necessary when the law requires it or in the good faith belief that such action is necessary, particularly when disclosure is necessary to identify, contact, or bring legal action against someone who may be causing injury to others or interfering with our rights or property.
How You Can Access, Update, or Delete Your Personal Data
You have the right to:
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Security
We take commercially reasonable steps to protect the Personal Data you provide to us from misuse, disclosure, or unauthorized access. We only share your Personal Data with trusted third parties who use the same level of care in processing your Personal Data. That being said, we cannot guarantee that your Personal Data will always be secure due to technology or security breaches. Should there be a data breach of which we are aware, we will inform you immediately.
Anti-Spam Policy
We have a no spam policy and provide you with the ability to opt-out of our communications by selecting the unsubscribe link at the footer of all emails. We have taken the necessary steps to ensure that we are compliant with the CAN-SPAM Act of 2003 by never sending out misleading information. We will not sell, rent, or share your email address.
Third Party Websites
We may link to other websites on our Website. We have no responsibility or liability for the content and activities of any other individual, company, or entity whose website or materials may be linked to our Website or its content, and thus we cannot be held liable for the privacy of the information on their website or that you voluntarily share with their website. Please review their privacy policies for guidelines as to how they respectively store, use, and protect the privacy of your Personal Data.
Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act Compliance
We do not collect any information from anyone under 18 years of age in compliance with COPPA (Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act) and the GDPR (General Data Protection Regulation of the EU). Our Website and its content is directed to individuals who are at least 18 years old or older.
Notification of Changes
We may use your Personal Data, such as your contact information, to inform you of changes to the Website or its content, or, if requested, to send you additional information about us. We reserve the right, at our sole discretion, to change, modify, or otherwise alter our Website, its content, and this Privacy Policy at any time. Such changes and/or modifications shall become effective immediately upon posting our updated Privacy Policy. Please review this Privacy Policy periodically. Continued use of any of information obtained through or on the Website or its content following the posting of changes and/or modifications constituted acceptance of the revised Privacy Policy. Should there be a material change to our Privacy Policy, we will contact you via email or by a prominent note on our Website.
Data Controller and Processors
We are the data controllers as we are collecting and using your Personal Data. We use trusted third parties as our data processors for technical and organizational purposes, including for payments and email marketing. We use reasonable efforts to make sure our data processors are GDPR-compliant.If you have any questions about this Privacy Policy, please contact us at graeme@graemeseabrook.com
Last Updated: January 2025
This was originally published on my old blog between 2012 and 2020. I’m sharing it here because it’s still important — in many cases, not nearly enough has changed. I’ve been talking about The Motherload™️ and the humanity of moms for more than a decade now, and it doesn’t look like I’ll be stopping anytime soon.
I'm quitting Weight Watchers (WW).
This isn't a huge deal since I was never really all that into it in the first place. I have friends that loved it and lost weight on it and still use it as a maintenance tool, and that is wonderful. I'm not knocking it (so please don't try to change my mind in the comments!).
I decided to quit Weight Watchers after my father called me fat on the phone today.
Let me explain…
I got pregnant. I ate like a sitcom version of a pregnant woman. I gained weight like a real-life woman who ate like a sitcom version of a pregnant woman. I had the baby. I started losing weight. I was sucked into a vortex of depression and an anxiety-laden hell the likes of which I do not wish on my worst enemy, and I have been battling my way out ever since.
A month ago I weighed MORE than I did the day before Buddy was born. You read that right — MORE. That was the thing that people could see. They couldn't see the millions of tiny weights dragging me down every second of every day. They couldn't see the bands of hot fire that squeeze my heart and lungs on a regular basis. They cannot understand the depression or the anxiety, so they focus on the weight.
They make assumptions — that I'm eating too much, or eating the wrong things, or being lazy, or not really sticking with Weight Watchers. They don't ask if there is anything else going on. Please God, don't let anyone have to talk about feelings!
I want to live. I want to be healthy. I want to live a healthy life. I actively want those things. This is a revelation for me because there were months and months when I could not say any of that truthfully. I was living because the only way to love my son and Adam was to be alive. That was it. To dull the pain — and sometimes to reinforce the pain — I ate. Moving hurt, so I didn't do it. My entire existence was centered around escaping the pain as much as possible.
I don't know if it was the drugs, or writing here, or people pissing me off, or missing the relationship that Adam and I used to have, or watching Buddy grow into this remarkable baby, but something was the straw that broke the camel's back.
I'm in therapy now. I took action to try and get better. Dr. Warren tells me that life isn't supposed to be this hard and it doesn't have to hurt this much. The only way to get better is through the pain. Every morning I take my Zoloft. I take my vitamins. I get out of bed and I take care of my child. I work to grow my business and I plan for my future. I do my mental health “homework” — reading something Dr. Warren has suggested or paying attention to stray thoughts and feelings — whatever she asks me to do. Five times a week I either go to the gym or to a Barre Evolution class.
I'm not trying to lose weight — I'm trying to save my life.
I'm not trying to lose weight so that I don't embarrass my dad or to make anyone else more comfortable. I'm trying to be more healthy because I have been promised by people who should know what they are talking about that it is possible for me to feel happiness again. They say I have a chance at more than a fleeting second of not feeling horrible. They say I can get back to real, genuine laughter and a smile that is not 90% mask. They say I can be the woman I want my son to have as his first love, and Adam to have as his last. They say that to become that woman I need the endorphins, stamina, and general health that working out and eating well will bring me.
Instead of WW, this is my new “diet.”I won't be on a diet. EVER. AGAIN. I'm going to try and stay away from any food that has ingredients I cannot pronounce. (Special exceptions will be made once a quarter for Velveeta shells and cheese… because I said so.) I'm going to eat all the veggies I want and I'm going to try and have multiple colors on each plate. I'm going to stick to the hand rule for meat and starches: a serving size is meat the size of your fist and for starches a handful. I'm not counting calories and I'm not tracking points. I'm going to treat my body like something I'm grateful for and maybe someday soon I will actually BE grateful for it.
My father says I have to lose the weight. My question — which he never answered — is, “Or what?” What is this thing that will happen if I don't? Will I lose my job? My child? Adam? Do you think that love is something that can be lost or gained because of numbers on a scale? What do you think will happen if I never lose any weight?
WHY DO YOU CARE SO MUCH ABOUT MY WEIGHT AND SO LITTLE ABOUT MY MENTAL HEALTH?!?
I am the least educated person in my immediate family and I am the only person in my immediate family who has done any research at all on depression and anxiety. Of course, I had to — for me this is life and death. Still, it makes a nearly unbearable day even worse when the ones who love you and who should be fighting for your life alongside you are making ridiculous assumptions and focusing on trivialities. I know they love me.
I just wish they knew me.
It hurts every day. Living is painful. Not romantically painful or melodramatically painful, but annoyingly painful. It is pain like nails on a chalkboard. Living hurts me and it frustrates me and it wears me down every day. Adam says we will get through this. He has never lied to me, and so I have faith. Dr. Warren says I can do this and she will help me. She has a Ph.D. after her name, kind eyes, and steel in her voice — so I will do as she says. My best friend says she misses me. She has always been right there when I needed her and so I will reach out. The glimmer in my baby's eyes and the beam of his smile are my lights at the end of the tunnel, and so I will crawl toward them day after day.
I will get better.
I will get stronger.
I will be healthy.
I will have a life, and one day I will wake up EXCITED to be alive. I could give less than two shits about how much I weigh when that day comes.
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